theres just something about arguing over salad, then pasta, then again over a grill that makes the world seem simple and comforting. Actually making dinner was a long but rewarding experience. I had flashes of our lives 20 years from now and that was very cool.

I'm sorry sonya, please dont throw yourself into a ditch! I still like you. "I'm not gonna lie to you Jess."

My dad fixed my break!! Now I don't feel like I'm going to die when I drive my car :)

I love listening to Ave Maria.

OH MY GOSH

OH
MY
GOSH

JAY-SUS.


I overtalked 100$$$$ on my cell phone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(and yesterday i broke my parents bed).

i think im going to go throw myself in a ditch.

stacy work. michelle work. sherry europe. drew gone. everyone gone gone gone gone. i just called derrick and realized (for the hundredth time) what a horrible person i am. i don't return phone calls. i put friendships on hold. i push people aways. I HATE MYSELF and i also miss everyone. whatever. soon it will be my time to go (i can't wait).

i got home at like 2 yesterday. i love it when all of us hang out. it is the most comfortable feeling in the world. and it is really happy like when you're watching a movie you love with someone you love and you watch them react to all of the funny parts and sad parts. you just feel so happy because you have someone to share it with.

my mom woke me up at 6 and pulled me out of bed-- actually the couch bc its cooler downstairs so i sleep there-- to go running. i dont remember the last time the beach was so beautiful (thanks to low tide and perfect wave conditions). i said id come back later to surf but i am temporarily friendless. we'll see. i'm not so much the independent type but this may be worth it.

have a good weekend my friends, whats left of you.

did i ever tell you that i love the movie chocolat? and that i am in love with everything french? and that i am absolutely horrible at goodbyes?

i suck at goodbyes; please dont hate me.

concerts im missing: white stripes, hot hot heat, and maroon 5.

I WANT A LOVER NOW!!!!

WHERE ARE ALL THE LOVERS?

I would die if my journals got out. Okay well, actually people can read the boy meets world series finale transcipt that I have randomly in there...but thats about it. My journals are soooo embarrassing, they should be burned...except then I probably wouldn't remember my life. But that wouldn't be such a bad thing :D Hey sonya, maybe your sister could be some famous singer/songwriter using your journal entries.

I realized walking my dog today that there are these HUGE SPIDERS that can run as fast as dogs living in the trees along the sidewalks. I walked through like 10 spiderwebs and I felt nasty and sick.

so i finished the traveling pants book.. and in less than 24 hours yo!

this morning my mom gave me a BED BATH AND BEYOND catalog and it really excites me. basket case shower tote and navigator desk lamp!!!! hidden drawers and plastic basket organizers and YES MICHELLE-- school suppliessss.

i have absolutely nothing planned for today and that excites me A LOT. waking up to a clean room; 24 obligation-free hours.

on a random note, my sister read my entire journal and turned the stuff i wrote into songs. i dont have the energy to yell or care anymore. i've been doing that for seventeen years. i know i should hide it [the journal] but i dont have the energy for that either.

privacy does not exist in this house.

Oh. we saw SWAT--I didn't want to love Colin Ferrell or whatever his name is. I still don't...but I have to say that him wearing a uniform, being an ex-navy seal and playing with little kids...not in the stacy kind of way...has taken him off my "DISLIKE" list.

Want to know something that could be sorta interesting?? My username for Blogger is: spamley. I get a kick out of it every single time I come to post, teehee. I also want to read sonya's published journal entries. Hopefully, they'll be nothing like her stories. MUHAHA. <--I bet you she'll make me erase that so enjoy it while you can!! Makes you wonder, doesn't it?

"The Traveling Pants" has now become the traveling book. It is making its rounds and is currently in the hands of one ms. sophia sobko. Teehee, I love it:)

I must admit that even though I hate the aspect of starting school--I love to go school supply shopping. I think it's fun! Mmmm...new pencils/pens and reams of paper:) I also like the old regular stamps that you LICK. I hate going to gas stations at night where there's potential for harrassment from creepy men. And you don't want to talk to them at ALL but you are also afraid they'll kill you. Or maybe that's just me.

Did I mention that when school starts I'll be back at zany brainy?? Well, there it is. I don't want to go...please, someone help me!!

I'm currently listening to Ave Maria. I love it, it always makes me cry. I want it to play at my wedding--that is, if I get married. **insert some funny noise here**

I couldn't get to sleep last night. I faded in and out of "sleep" until about 3 am. I lay in my bed for about an hour then I went online and wrote something like stacy when she's by herself at home--bet that makes you think too--I made it back to my bed at 6 am. It has always depressed me when I'm awake when I shouldn't be and the sun is coming up. For some reason, I FEEL WRONG.

I'm crazy, I know.

"The Sun" maroon5
PLEASE PLEASE download this song!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After school
Walking home
Fresh dirt under my fingernails
And I can smell hot asphalt
Cars screech to a halt to let me pass
And I cannot remember
What life was like through photographs
Trying to recreate images life gives us from our past

And sometimes it's a sad song

But I cannot forget
Refuse to regret
So glad I met you
Take my breath away
Make everyday
Worth all of the pain that I have
Gone through
And mama I've been cryin'
Cause things ain't how they used to be
She said the battles almost won
And we're only several miles from the sun

Moving on down the street
I see people I won't ever meet
Think of her, take a breath
Feel the beat in the rhythm of my steps
And sometimes it's a sad song

But I cannot forget
Refuse to regret
So glad I met you
Take my breath away
Make everyday
Worth all of the pain that I have
Gone through
And mama I've been cryin'
Cause things ain't how they used to be
She said the battles almost won
And we're only several miles from the sun

The rhythm of her conversation
The perfection of her creation
The sex she slipped into my coffee
The way she felt when she first saw me
Hate to love and love to hate her
Like a broken record player
Back and forth and here and gone
And on and on and on and on

why is it that i am html retarded but my sister sits down for one day and comes up with this?

i went to the beach TWICE today. first surfing with sherry in the FREEZING visibilityzero crimson-tinted waters of torrey pines blech. but it was a good time. and then to the beautiful waters of del mar with my contacts IN with ms. katyana rose. and yes the hour it took to park was worth it because of the high concentration of lovers and the huge waves that broke us in half.

running today was hard and scary. i'm exhausted.

what else??? .. i love joanna. oh and i finished caramelo. on to the traveling pants book JUST as soon as i clean my room!!what else? i got a letter from matt and i think he's doing okay. hi matt. the fan is right next to me- blowing RIGHT in my face- and it is driving me INSANEEEE. there is no compromise: either it is deathly hot or the fan blows furiously into my nostrils. yummay.

my mom is getting on my case about me not making a list of stuff to buy for college. soo:

new underwear
new socks
jeans
nice black shoes
tennis shoes?
cheap flip flops
shower stuff
a laundry hamper-type thing?
non halogen desk lamp
backpack for laptop
pens and pencils and notebooks etc
linens ('n things)
order more contacts and glasses


what else do i need people?!?!

oh did i tell you how i bought a really cool journal? and if it had a flavor it would be strawberry banana or pink lemonade. and the other day i was feeling introspective so i wrote 8 pages and one day you will see them published.

I WILL WAKE UP TO A CLEAN ROOM TOMORROW AND MY HEART WILL BURST FROM HAPPINESS.

I love that the blogger says "and in the darkness blog them." if you have a blog...you know what I mean, if you don't....then you'll never get it.

THE FroSH BABIES RIDE AGAIN!!! =)

its effing HOT. caramelo is progressing smoothly.. i keep having chocolate cravings. and big fat hamburger cravings. ignoring them is painful; fruit doesn't seem to help. it is so so so incredibly hot. my skin is melting off of my body. girl friends are such a pain in the ass. i'd rather just have guy friends. but they all left me or are leaving now. the world is such a lonely place and people are far too complicated. i'm gonna go make picture albums and eat plumbs. i don't feel like being social for the rest of summer. please leave me alone.