Saturday, November 29, 2003

i'm a bipolar polar bear.
all of the worrying i did about seeing people was completely pointless... everyone is just the way i remember them. it's like i stepped into a time machine and traveled back in time where i watched a half-hour episode of my own life. i'm sitting here, talking to someone who i havent seen in more than 2 dimensions for several months and they are real and i can touch them and smell them and if i say something, they'll answer me. it's surreal and real all at the same time. and goodbyes aren't sad this time around because they will melt into hellos in just a few weeks. i cant wait till winter break :D!! gotta get through finals first... i'm ready to work really hard so i can feel that i truly deserve my break. so far, college has been lots of sleeping and that's about it. i'm ready to go back tomorrow and WORK.

i love my friends!!!

Friday, November 28, 2003

i know it's one day too late, but i am thankful for:

new friends
old friends
family
sleep
food
ucla
music
art
united states
nature:
[the ocean
the forest
the sky
grass]
books
teachers

Thursday, November 27, 2003

Today I felt so blessed. I was just really happy and grateful for family. God is so good.

But being surrounded by family also reminds you of the people in your life who are no longer around. And that, I think, is the worst part of the holidays.
i dont know.... tell me pleaseeeee-- is this really happening to me?! is this really happening to me?!?!

is
this
really
happening
to me?
dear michelle, you can be anything if you put your mind to it.
the past few days have been so good :-)

...on tuesday, after an exhaustingly stressful trip, barb and i got to san diego. . . we dropped our stuff off and headed to the scene with her bro to see phantom planet. it was probably the best concert i've ever been to!!!!!!! (nsync doesn't count because that's just a whole different part of my life). anyway, we were in the second row and the lead singer, alex, was so freakin cool-- he kept stage diving into the audience and he held my hand for stability. and i tapped his butt. :-o!! hahaha i knew all the songs and they were just sooo good-- they sang all the good ones, even lonely day. then alex was like 'it's stupid how they seperate the audience from the band' so he let the front two rows go onstage. so me and barb went on stage and sang 'california' with them-- we were standing like directly behind him so we hugged him! ! ! ! ! it was such a lovely, happy moment. and apart from being funny and a wonderful singer, he is like 500000000 on the hot scale. so i basically love them 5 million times more now because this kind of thing never happens to me. i'm usually in the back, being jealous. after the concert barb and i picked up matt and we all went to karen's house so barb and i could get our stuff from her. i was really hyper and we all went crazy on her street and i saw two shooting stars.

...wednesday: i woke up at 1230. haha and barb and matt and i went to wahoo's and on the way we almost died. i ordered way too much food and then we went to la jolla shores because the ocean is my love. we watched the surfers and found some flowers and took some pictures and when we stepped into the water our feet turned numb. at home i just hung around until 8, when michelle came over with a bag full of nsync tapes. I LOVE NSYNC ! ! ! ! ! ! !oh man, you should have seen us. from disney concert to hbo concert, we were reliving memories and loving justin and screaming like little teenyboppers because that's us no matter how old we are. IT'S THE HUMAN BEATBOX... FRIKKI FRIKKI FRIKKI.. aaah. after michelle left, my sister and i watched jackass the movie, where we saw people drinking their pee and snorting wasabi. it was great.

...thursday: my momma woke me up at 7 (bleehhhh) and we went to torrey pines (i drove!). we had to run away from the water that was trying to swallow up our shoes. we hiked up to the cliffs and went on the trails and i almost stepped on a snake but my mom saved me. then we went to champagne in del mar and ate breakfast mmmmm. and then henry's where i saw a lover, and then i drove home. i love driving; it's so relaxing. now i'm here and my stomach doesn't feel well and my mom is telling me that i swallowed a bacteria and i can't eat anything. not eat on thanksgiving? i don't think so. hopefully whatever it is goes away.

what a crappy post-- i'm not in much of a writing mood. i can't articulate anything. well i hope everyone has a really good thanksgiving. enjoy your time at home!!!!!

Tuesday, November 25, 2003

you know what i'd be, i mean if i had my goddam choice? A Christmas Tree decorator. Either that, or (along with sonya) I'd be an offical slaughter of f*cking insane people--yessss licensed to kill--and make the world a better place.

Sunday, November 23, 2003

that was a nice, blogworthy post michelle. you sound almost normal... but you aren't because you love your teacher. i have some minutes to spare because i got all ready to meet barb for brunch but she was still sleeping. its funny how this place is silent until about 1pm, when people start creeping out. then they go their seperate ways and it's quiet all weekend long until about 2am, when they all come back. i was making my roommate watch amelie last night... it made me happy. COLLIGNON!!!

oh oh yesterday i went and bought some sketchpads and pencils and karen & i took the bus (which was free yaaay) to the GETTY (museum). it only took 10 min to get there and it was so wonderful and beautiful and the grass was REALLY green, which always makes me happy. it was just what i needed because i was getting sick of campus and people and everything. i think i took in like 5 billion gallons of fresh clean air (except we were on a hill in LA so it was probly polluted?).

and on friday.. i watched charlie and the chocolate factory in my room. i felt really happy-- too happy, so i watched life is beautiful. and that made my nose runny and snotty and my eyes swollen shut, so i guess it was dumb of me to watch that on a fri night. its still the best movie ever tho- watch it. and then at night i went with karen, barb, and bianca (karens roommate), to ackerman $2 movies to watch L'AUBERGE ESPAGNOLE, which has amelie in it. that was a very good movie-- its like everything i want minus the affairs. so yeah, friday=way too many movies. my contacts were mad at me.

so today has got to be a hardcore work day because i am behind.. MAN i CANNOT get into work mode. i better get my act together. oh and eek, i better figure out what im gonna talk about with my phil TA bc i set up an appointment with him and i really have nothing to say.