i think we enjoy pain and misery. they make happiness more real? they make happiness?

vomit

vomit

just call me stupid.

today today was the first day of school. I was made uncomfortable in every class and can someone please tell me why there are so many people who know french in the lowest level class? is it just to make me nervous and unresponsive? bc really, its working. I also said something really stupid in the class that I most need to make the best impression and now I just want the earth to envelope me in a shell. I cant WAIT to get to latin tomorrow for refuge and comfort. I know being uncomfortable is supposed to be a good thing bc you challenge yourself blahblah blah who cares. I like my comfort zone damn it and will hold onto it with my life.

Matisse, Chagall, & Me













what do you do when
you're in a bad mood?

i whine, i sulk, i call and
complain to everyone
i know and then when
there's nothing left to do
i draw.

and then i feel so happy;
I FEEL WONDERFUL.

i feel like crap. i cant stop feeling shitty and its pathetic. i hate myself.